Don’t Fight Pride, Resentment and Fear. Do This Instead.

Gratitude crowding Pride, Resentment, and Fear out of my heart.

During a 12 Step meeting I attended the group was discussing our hopes for learning to live in a state of humility. One man said that humility keeps getting crowded out by pride and resentment in his heart. There was a lively conversation about how to fight pride and resentment.

As I listened, I was reminded of the story of a wise Cherokee grandfather who told his grandson about the two wolves fighting inside his heart—inside every human heart. One was evil and the other good. When the boy asked which wolf would win the battle, his grandfather said, “the one you feed.”

Sometimes fighting the evil actually feeds it. When I work hard to overcome pride and resentment, I am focusing on pride and resentment. The attention I give them feeds them, even if it is negative attention. I judge myself lacking when I dwell on those feelings  which can put me into a cycle of guilt and/or shame.

Nurturing something positive, instead, works better in my experience. As it grows, it will crowd out the resentment and pride, and fear as well.

What is that positive I can focus on? What can I nurture that will swell and grow and leave no room for negative attitudes and feelings? For me it is gratitude. When I fill my heart with gratitude and focus on how grateful I am for the innumerable blessings of my life, it crowds out the tendencies of the natural woman toward fear, pride and resentment. My heart sings with joy when I focus on gratitude, and it isn’t about what I am grateful for. Once I started looking, I saw blessings all around me. No, it is about the feeling itself—the attitude of gratitude!

When I cultivate gratitude I am feeding and watering love in my heart. Love for and from God fills my heart and crowds out all negatives. It is an awesome way to live!

  • Do you recognize negative feelings or attitudes in your life?
  • Are you willing to focus on gratitude to crowd those out?
  • List 10 things you are grateful for today. Are you willing to do that every day?

Please share your thoughts about this post by commenting below.

Related Posts: Focus: Riding through the Boulders, Practicing Instinctively Turning to the LordGratitude: A Desire to Magnify My CallingsGrateful for My Addiction! Are You Kidding Me?


2 thoughts on “Don’t Fight Pride, Resentment and Fear. Do This Instead.

  1. My mother referred me to your blog but it turns out, I already follow it through the LDS ARP blogs website (I write my own blog that is represented on that website as well).

    She sent me this post because I have made a goal to work the 12 steps this year to focus on forgiving my ex-husband and other past hurtful relationships that I have been holding onto. This post is definitely in line with where I’m starting, focusing on the gratitude and not giving the evil any attention.

    I need to start a gratitude journal again and keep it with me as I work through the 12 step program and start attending ARP meetings. I’ve only ever attended the ‘family support’ meetings and am excited to attend the meetings, focusing on myself and how I can let go and move forward in my life.

  2. This is so true! Thanks to a wonderful sponsor or helper person who gave me the assignment to send her a grateful list of at least 5 things each day. They were to be ways that I could see that Heavenly Father blessed me that day. Because of that exercise I have felt his love each time I look and thank him for my daily blessings. It has blessed me to see his hand all around me. He blesses others around me and I can see that and the miracles that he puts into our lives. I am so thankful for this blessing. I know that dwelling on the negative and the things wrong in my life never bring happiness nor the spirit. Joy and hope are felt as I thank him for my blessings. Thank you for that wonderful reminder!

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