Monthly Archives: February 2015

Steps 1, 2, and 3: I Can’t, He Can, I’ll Let Him

Image of first three steps: 1. I can't. 2. He can. 3. I'll let Him. There is a short-hand way of describing the first three Steps of the 12-Step Recovery process: “I can’t, He can, I’ll let Him.” The “He,” for me, is the Lord.

Step 1: I Can’t

Step 1 is about admitting my powerlessness. I did everything I knew how to do to improve my situation, and it got me to where I am right now. Goodness knows I tried. I tried various diets and exercise programs hoping to lose weight. I tried dozens of self-help books to overcome my shortcomings. I tried three different therapists. None of those things brought a long term solution. By the time I started working the 12 Steps I was pretty much at the end of the line. If the 12 Steps didn’t work, I had nowhere else to turn.

Step 2: He Can

Step 2 is about acknowledging that the Lord can do for me what I cannot do for myself. He can fix problems that I cannot imagine the solution for. He is omnipotent. It is arrogant and prideful to think that I am so broken that I am beyond the help of the Lord. No one is too broken for Christ to fix. He cares about each and every one of us individually and wants to be our personal Savior.

Step 3: I’ll Let Him

Step 3 is about making a decision to trust the Lord and turn my life over to Him. He has promised that he would be right by my side and would help me do anything that is in harmony with His will, and I know that overcoming my addiction and letting go of my shortcomings and character defects fits that description.

He will not do for me what I can do for myself. And He will only do what I am willing to let Him do. He will not violate my agency. I do not have to understand what the solution is, nor do I have to tell Him what to do or when to do it. He is smarter than I am. I need to trust that His solution will be what is best for me. I need to turn the matter over to Him, pray for guidance on what footwork He wants me to do, and do the footwork He gives me to do. I also need to wait on His timing; patiently, if possible.

Progress

The 12 Steps did and do work for me. I have experienced His love personally. I have received a new heart. I now walk in faith and not fear. I trust that His solution will be best for me. I have long term recovery, both from compulsive eating and from many of the shortcomings and character defects that kept my life in turmoil. Someday, in the Lord’s time, I hope to be delivered from all of them. I have comfortable relationships with my loved ones. When I mess up, I follow the steps and personal revelation to make amends quickly. I love living in a state of recovery. It is a good state to live in.

  • What are your addictions, shortcomings and character defects? Are you willing to admit that you are powerless over all of them?
  • Do you believe that the Lord is capable of removing your shortcomings and restoring you to complete spiritual health? Why or why not?
  • How do you feel about turning your will and your life over to Him? Are you willing to ask and allow Him to be in charge of your life?
  • Are you willing to seek inspiration on the footwork you need to do and act upon the revelation you receive?

Please share your thoughts about this post by commenting below.

 

The Chess Strategy for Living

Chess board strategy image. When I was a young girl, my Dad’s desk was a place of wonder to me. He had so many treasures in his drawers: a beautiful slender silver letter opener, India ink pens, engineering and architecture rulers, and templates for drawing circles and other shapes, to name a few. Among the treasures were some old yellowed newspaper clippings. One of them was a story that mentioned my Dad.

A famous chess master was coming to town and would be playing against a large number of amateur players at the same time — upwards of twenty, if I recall correctly. My Dad was the youngest chess player to qualify to participate at the age of 14.

Twenty games at the same time! How could anyone keep the strategy for twenty games in their head at the same time, I wondered. So I asked my Dad about it. He said, “You don’t. You come to the board, make the move that most improves your position at that moment in time, and move on.”

I have often pondered that idea, and have found that it is actually an excellent philosophy for living. I am sure that the chess master has a vision for the game — ending in a win. I have a vision for my life, too — ending in eternal life for me and my loved ones. But I can face each new challenge, each move of the adversary, each new day, by making the move that will most improve my position at that moment in time, and move on.

What moves will improve my position? Here are a few thoughts: drawing near to the Lord, growing spiritually, learning to love unconditionally, gaining new skills, learning to trust God, obeying the commandments and living one day at a time.

It is intriguing to me that this philosophy of living is very consistent with my recent post “Living Fully in the Present.” The chess master cannot win the game by living in the past — beating himself up for a bad move or glorying in a previous game. He cannot win the game by living in the future — imagining each move his opponent might make and how glorious his victory will be. He can only win the game by studying the board and making the move that will most improve his position at that moment in time: the present.

  • What is your vision for your life?
  • What challenges are you facing right now?
  • What strategy or moves would improve your position at this moment in time?
  • What are you willing to do today?

Please share your thoughts about this metaphor by commenting below.

 

Christ is the Power Source

And Christ hath said: If ye will have faith in me ye shall have power to do whatsoever thing is expedient in me. (Moroni 7:33)

Image of the Son as a power source, with the Sun rising behind Him.When I first began to understand that I was powerless, and that any and all power that I have is given to me by Christ for the purpose of carrying out his will (see Moroni 7:33), the picture I had in my mind was of me as a little old lady, leaning upon the arm of Jesus who was guiding me across the street like a boy scout. As I continued to ponder the idea that Jesus is the source of all power, it came to me that power source is also a term that could be used to describe an electrical outlet or a battery, or even the sun.

So how is it that I receive power from a power source?  I plug in to it!  As I read the scriptures, ponder and pray, attend Church and serve others; as I am obedient to the Lord’s commandments, I draw near to Him.  When I lean upon His arm rather than my own understanding and seek His counsel and guidance; when I ask Him to grant unto me the power to carry out His will, I am plugging myself in to the ultimate power source, the Son.  And His power flows into me and through me and I can do all things which He directs me to do!

The Lord would never set us up to fail.  He loves us more than we can comprehend.  Whenever He asks us to do anything, either by direct personal revelation or through our (His) Priesthood leaders, He is willing to give us the power to carry out His will. We must prepare ourselves to receive it by becoming humble and teachable. We must sincerely do all that we can do, in faith relying upon Him to provide the power we need to complete our tasks, overcome our obstacles, or reach our goals.

  • What are you powerless over?
  • Are you willing to do the things that are described in this metaphor to “plug in” so that you can receive the Lord’s power to do what you cannot do alone?
  • What action will you take today?

Please share your thoughts about this metaphor by commenting below.